Poor Quality Photomontage of RAD apartment
It’s going to be so nice finally living on my own. I have always had a roommate
in some capacity or another. I love this place. There are so many things I need
to purchase. My first big purchase will be a microwave and a vacuum. The privacy
will allow me to finish my book. I NEED TO FINISH MY BOOK!
Posted by RAD at 08:20 PM | Comments (7)
February 24, 2005
1.21 jiggowatts
My favorite movie of all time is 1985’s Back to the Future. I used to run around
dressed as Marty McFly from the life preserver to the calculator watch to the
massive 1980’s sunshades. I have always been fascinated with time travel. I want
a DeLorean.
What if your favorite movie of all time? Any genre. Pick one. Do it.
Posted by RAD at 10:22 AM | Comments (8)
February 23, 2005
A Benjamin
Do you know it is impossible to spend a hundred dollar bill in Denver at 6
o’clock in the morning? I needed breakfast and gas this AM and had to go to 4
different places before I could get change.
It was disturbingly difficult to talk to the store clerks because most were
speaking a mix of Spanish, English and something Middle Eastern. I had to flash
the cash to get any sort of information out from them. I ended up at a ghetto
7-11 where I purchased a pack of gum and a cup of nasty, coffee-ground-filled
coffee. I was supposed to receive 97 dollars in change and the timed safe
thingie, which usually dispenses 20-dollar bills, was only dispensing 5-dollar
bills. I had to wait 16 minutes for the damn thing to spit out all of my change.
After finally filling up my gas tank, I was almost late for work. Almost late
means 10 minutes early because I usually get to work 30 minute early. I am
punctual.
Posted by RAD at 09:26 AM | Comments (0)
humping
The word of the day is humping
humping
[v] 1.) To bend or round into a hump; arch. 2.) Slang -- To exert (oneself). 3.)
To carry, especially on the back. 4.) Vulgar Slang -- To engage in sexual
intercourse with.
Use humping in a sentence. Here are my contributions:
1.) I’ve been humping boxes for days and weeks because of my move.
2.) He and his wife have been humping like rabbits because it’s their
anniversary.
3.) The humping of the clay created a clay arch.
4.) I’m cuckoo for humping.
Posted by RAD at 08:26 AM | Comments (10)
February 22, 2005
The Eye Patch
Before I had glasses, when I was in first grade, I had a lazy eye and had to go
to eye therapy several times a week. To help solve this problem, I was forced to
wear an eye patch over my right eye. While this sounds like a cool thing, it was
far from good.
I can only imagine how my large youthful head looked with an eye patch
encircling it. I know the patch was freakishly hefty on me. I must have had an
extra large.
I was made fun of mercilessly. Comments like, “Hee hee you’re a pirate,” as I
was being kicked down the stairs and “It’s not Halloween, why are you wearing an
eye patch?” as I was being shoved to the pebbly ground in the play area and
“You’re such a geek for wearing an eye patch,” asshole classmate Rudolph would
say as he took the cheeseburger from my lunch tray and shoved it into his filthy
gob.
The pointing and laughter didn’t help me adjust to the eye patch either. My
teachers would try to help me in my grief, but they only made it worse with
mistake comments, “Yes One-Eyed Russie, the answer to number 12 is 387. Good for
you Bloody Russell Rackham. You get a star. Arg!”
I hope none of your children ever have to wear an eye patch while attending
public elementary school.
Posted by RAD at 10:16 AM | Comments (7)
Bush administration kicks science in the rear
Oh boy. I could have told you this one. The Bush administration is stifling
science. Bush's proposed 2005 federal budget is slashing spending for basic
research and reducing investments in education designed to produce the nation's
future scientists.
This isn’t new news. On April 29, 2002, during Bush’s first four years, NASA
announced the cancellation of the X-38 program. The X-38 was two years short of
completing its flight test phase. The X-38 Crew Return Vehicle would have been a
lifeboat for up to 7 people aboard the International Space Station Alpha.
Currently there is nothing but a 3 person Russian capsule and this severely
limits the amount of people to be stationed in orbit.
The long, hard, cold road to future scientific breakthroughs from this great
country is becoming more and more riddled with obstacles.
In quazi-good news, NASA has received a budget boost. Most of the new money will
be going to the space shuttle, ISS Alpha and Bush's plan to explore the moon and
Mars. What is suffering is the space agency's scientific research efforts. I
think the Bush administration is taking the wrong approach to the moon/Mars
initiative, but I am happy that something is being done. We need a human
presence on Mars. It will be the greatest adventure in the history of humankind.
Posted by RAD at 09:36 AM | Comments (0)
niggardly
Per normsquatch's request, the word of the day is niggardly
niggardly
[pn] Grudging and petty in giving or spending. Meanly small; scanty or meager.
Use niggardly in a sentence. Here are my contributions:
1.) "The cook dished out a niggardly sum of gruel," said normsquatch.
2.) Washington, DC's black Mayor, Anthony Williams, gladly accepted the
resignation of his white staff member, David Howard, because Mr. Howard uttered
the word 'niggardly' in a private staff meeting. Webster's Tenth Edition defines
the word 'niggardly' to "grudgingly mean about spending or granting". The
Barnhard Dictionary of Etymology traces the origins of 'niggardly' to the
1300's, and to the words 'nig' and 'ignon', meaning "miser" in Middle English.
Nowhere in any of these references is any mention of racial connotations
associated with the word 'niggardly'. In other words, it's a perfectly good and
useful word.
3.) To scoff at political correctness, I left a niggardly tip for the horrible
service at Waffle House.
4.) I’m cuckoo for niggardly.
Posted by RAD at 09:18 AM | Comments (3)
February 21, 2005
Saturnian Auroras
"For I dipt into the future, far as human eye could see, saw the vision
of the world, and all the wonder that would be."
--Alfred Lord Tennyson

Posted by RAD at 10:15 PM | Comments (1)
Biscuits and Gravy Day
It may be President’s Day, but I declare this day Biscuits and Gravy Day!
Sometime today you must help yourself to a mess of exquisite biscuits and gravy
that’ll cause you rise on up and proclaim with a hearty holler that B&G makes
you sing in glorious jubilee!

B&G with scram eggs and crunchy bacon
You’re quest today is to score B&G. Do it. Report back on it. Thankyouverymuch.
Do you have what it takes to be a member of The Biscuits and Gravy Society???
Posted by RAD at 12:28 AM | Comments (1)
February 20, 2005
Discovery to Launch May 15!
NASA’s return to flight will take place on May 15, 2005 when mission STS-114,
the Space Shuttle Discovery, launches. It’s about time. I wish I could make it
to Florida to see the launch. I have never seen a space shuttle launch before.
It’s one of my dreams. Atlantis launch set for July 12.

explanation of STS-114 mission patch
NASA space shuttle website
Posted by RAD at 06:11 PM | Comments (0)
Music Music Music
Allison passed the stick to me and I must oblige by completing it quickly.
Random 10 Albums Semi-Sorta Randomly pulled from my collection:
1.) U2 – How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb
2.) Ween – Pure Guava
3.) Bessie Smith – Martin Scorsese Presents The Blues
4.) Ken Burns's Jazz: The Story of American Music [BOX SET]
5.) VH1 Presents the Corrs Live in Dublin
6.) Outkast – Speakerboxxx/ The Love Below
7.) Johnny Cash – Sings Ballads of True West
8.) DJ Tiesto – Summerbreeze
9.) Back to the Future Soundtrack
10.) Angelo Badalamenti – Twin Peaks Fire Walk With Me Soundtrack
What is the total amount of music files on your computer?
13 GB
The last CD you bought is:
Gewn Stefani – Love, Angel, Music, Baby
What is the song you last listened to before this message?
What You Waiting For? – Gwen Stefani
Five songs that you often listen to or that mean a lot to you?
1.) "Sometimes You Can’t Make It On Your Own" by U2. This song speaks to me on
so many levels. It’s beautiful.
2.) "Big Jilm" by Ween. This song disturbs me but rocks. “What's the biggest
thing you ever did done see? Big Jilm
3.) "Silence" by DJ Tomcraft. This techno beat makes me skip and jump.
4.) "Wonderboy" by Tenacious D. Coz the D rules.
5.) "Kite" by U2. A passionate song.
Who are you gonna pass this stick to? (5 persons and why)
1. Candace – Because I know she likes music
2. Chris – He is a music lover and reviewer as well.
3. Jen -- She better do it.
4. Kristen – She always has song lyrics on her blog
5. Vicki – May you take this exercise in music and go with it.

Posted by RAD at 05:35 PM | Comments (2)
February 18, 2005
Bono and Nobel Prize
U2 frontman Bono and Indian sitar master Ravi Shankar are among 166 nominees for
the 2005 Nobel Peace Prize, a list that also includes Pope John Paul II and
former U.S. Secretary of State Colin Powell.

Posted by RAD at 11:27 AM | Comments (3)
GAH “Jammies” party
I am hosting a colossal Greatest American Hero party to celebrate the season one
DVD release. The party is this Saturday night. I already have RSVPs for 13
people. There is room for approximately 10 more people. So far there are 3
ladies to every man. I need more guys!
I pulled the classic 45-RPM record theme “Believe It Or Not” out of the Kemper’s
cargo space cubbyhole and he let me pose with it for some pictures. The 1981
classic is by Joey Scarbury. Look at the packaging! It’s in mint condition!
Wonder. Delight. History. GAH is one of the grandest television shows ever on
the small screen. Have you seen it?

Russ poses with the GAH theme song 45 record
Be there or be square. Costumes welcome. Dance contest begins at 6:30. The pilot
episode begins at 8:00 pm. Bring your food raw as we will cook it for you.
Liquor, wine and spirits served. Soda pop and iced tea will be available for the
designated drivers. Bring a hearty appetite because the cuisine will be flowing
from the tables. Email me for more information or if you have my telephone
number, give me a call.
Posted by RAD at 08:25 AM | Comments (4)
February 17, 2005
The Remarkable Reign of Robert Speer
Meg suggested we attend this Curious Theatre Company play sometime in March. It
looks pretty good. As I am a Denver history buff, this play might be mucho
interessant! I travel along Speer Blvd. all the time and am always hot to see
live theatre, especially when it brings a crucial period of Denver history back
to life.
The Curious Theatre Company presents:
Paris on the Platte:
The Remarkable Reign of Robert Speer
By Joan Holden
Directed by Chip Walton
March 12 - April 23, 2005
Previews March 10 + 11
Mayor Robert W. Speer transformed Denver into a "City Beautiful." His 1904-12
"Paris on the Platte" plan included tree-shaded streets, Civic Center Park,
Sloan's Lake Park, the Auditorium Arena, the Mount Evans highway and
improvements to City Park, the Denver Zoo and Denver Museum of Natural History.
Call for tickets 303.623.0524 or order online
Posted by RAD at 03:43 PM | Comments (0)
What A World Part II
The Durango cookie anxiety attack lady has been getting crank calls. Her spirit,
her soul, is damaged.
I know why her soul is harmed and tainted black. She took two teenagers to court
and they were ordered to pay $930 in medical bills because she claimed the
delivery of a plate of cookies scared her so much that she went to the hospital.
Because of all of the negative attention she has received, she hasn't returned
to her part-time job at the Wal-Mart (that explains it all) and might have to
give up the presidency and her seat on the board of the local food bank because
of the harmful attention she's received. She needs to expel cookie donations
from the food bank if she ever wants any semblance of normalcy to return to her
life.
She's received hundreds of crank calls, along with truckloads of weird and
wonderful packages, some containing cookies or cookie crumbs. It’s hilarious.
"All this over cookies," she said. "Our home is like a funeral parlor. They've
robbed us of our laughter. My spirit, my soul, is damaged."
Here is a hypothetical crank call from me to the cookie hater lady:
RING RING

Hello lady?

Yes?

Why you hate cookie?

Hello?

COOKIE! YOU HATE COOKIE! WHY?

My soul is damaged.

Cookie haters will burn in the Hades.

My…my…chest…a pain in my chest…my hand is tingling…

Try Girl Scout Cookies. They heal haters.

You people have robbed me of my laughter!

You make me laugh Cookie Hater. Do they sell cookies at Wal-Mart?

Leave me alone!!!

I want generous supplies of cheap Wal-Mart cookies for free.

I am hanging up now.

Fine. I’m cuckoo for cookies. Bababooey.

(crying)
PHONE GOES DEAD
Posted by RAD at 08:11 AM | Comments (1)
February 16, 2005
giving a shit
Someone once said to me, "You can take that poem you wrote and shove it up your
ass because you don't give a shit about anything."
Harsh words. Damaging words. Painful words. They were words that broke my
"impenetrable" heart.
Words are wonderful although scary things. Being a writer, I know the power of
words. It's amazing how something as lowly as a comma can change the whole
meaning of a sentence, making it have unintended meaning. Some text can be
misread. Other vocabulary is inappropriate to use under any circumstances like
the colorful "fuck you."
Words and communication are key to every situation. Although I see myself as a
"master" of words, I still have far to go and much to learn. I just need to
remember to think before I speak most of the time.
For the record: I have never shoved anything up my ass, let alone something I
took great care, pride, thought and love in writing. And the fact of the matter
is that I do give a shit.
Posted by RAD at 04:09 PM | Comments (0)
February 15, 2005
lard
The word of the day is lard
lard
[n] The white solid or semisolid rendered fat of a hog
Use lard in a sentence. Here are my contributions:
1.) I rubbed myself with lard to make the hogs more attracted to me.
2.) To be mean, I called her “Lard Bitch.”
3.) Jimmy the 6-year-old festers in his home like lard skim on soup.
4.) I’m cuckoo for lard.
Posted by RAD at 12:01 PM | Comments (4)
My pants are split
I noticed today that my work slacks are ripped in the buttocks region. I have
been walking around the office for who knows how long showing my American Flag
boxers or Fruit of the Loom undies. Very embarrassing.
Posted by RAD at 11:28 AM | Comments (4)
February 14, 2005
Valentine's Day 2005
Happy Friendship Day to everyone!

Biere de Mars Ale -- Fort Collins, Colorado USA, Russ, Camera Phone
Posted by RAD at 01:01 PM | Comments (3)
February 11, 2005
family
I love my family.

Posted by RAD at 08:47 AM | Comments (2)
February 10, 2005
smidge
The word of the day is smidge
[n] a tiny or scarcely detectable amount
Use smidge in a sentence. Here are my contributions:
1.) Just a spoonful of smidge helps the medicine go down.
2.) Obviously you only put on a smidge of deodorant this morning because you
reek.
3.) Strangely, there was only a smidge of grease left on my glasses after the
filthy man handed them to me.
4.) I’m cuckoo for smidge.
Posted by RAD at 02:30 PM | Comments (2)
Build your own Block I Apollo Guidance Computer (AGC)
Build your own Block I Apollo Guidance Computer (AGC) in your basement. The AGC
is the flight computer for the Apollo moon landings, with one unit in the
command module and one in the LEM. Facinating stuff.

It's a piece of computing history. It had a one-megahertz processor, one
kilobyte of random-access memory and 12 kilobytes of read-only memory. Typical
desktop computers today have about 1,000 times the processor speed and about
500,000 times the RAM and have dropped ROM for hard drives with millions of
times the capacity. Build one today. Do it.
Posted by RAD at 12:01 PM | Comments (0)
squatch sauce
Normsquatch can make a wicked good marinara sauce. A grand meal.

squatch sauce
Posted by RAD at 09:09 AM | Comments (4)
Transformers and Legos and Gobots Oh My
Toys. I played with many coolie toys when I was a youth child. Mainly
Transformers, Legos and Gobots. Transformers were my favorite. I once had a
birthday slumber party in which I received the ultra cool Decepticon Soundwave
and screamed and danced around the room as if I had won the lottery.
Soundwave is a Generation One Transformer. I tore open the gift so fast that the
box was shredded. I hoisted Soundwave on high, howling in childish jubilee while
my little friends ogled the triumphant gift. I of course hoarded it to myself
that night, even bedding down with the beloved Transformer toy; sleeping soundly
with it by my side, it’s plastic form scrapping and cutting me in my sleep.
Good times. Good times.
Posted by RAD at 08:55 AM | Comments (3)
February 09, 2005
Jimmy Spits

Posted by RAD at 07:39 AM | Comments (4)
February 08, 2005
Girl Scout Cookies®
It’s that time of year again friends. Girl Scout Cookies®!!! Yes! Girl Scout
Cookies®!!! My favorite were once called Tagalongs®, then Peanut Butter Patties®
and now they’re Tagalongs®/Peanut Butter Patties®. Regardless of their
registered trademark name, the crunchy vanilla cookies layered with bona fide
peanut butter and comprehensively covered with a chocolaty coating have me
dancing with jubilee every year. 2005 is no different, as I choreographed a
euphoric jig yesternight while lording over several boxes of Tagalongs®/Peanut
Butter Patties®.

Russ’ box of Tagalongs®/Peanut Butter Patties®
Here are the best selling Girl Scout Cookies® varieties:
25% Thin Mints
19% Samoas®/Caramel deLites™
13% Peanut Butter Patties®/Tagalongs®
11% Peanut Butter Sandwich/Do-si-dos™
09% Shortbread/Trefoils
Bis-grav Cookies®/Southern Mornin’ Formal Meal deLites® -- The Biscuit and Gravy
Cookie
Suggestions for new cookies are welcome, but the national Girl Scout
organization can make no promise to use them.
That’s unfortunate because I have an idea for a biscuit and gravy-flavored
cookie that I am sure would break all sorts of cookie selling records. Once you
bite into my buttermilky/flaky cookie, a sweet sausage gravy-like liquid bursts
from the center and dribbles down your front. My biscuit and gravy cookies will
also have a dual name and be called Bis-grav Cookies®/Southern Mornin’ Formal
Meal deLites®.
What is your favorite Girl Scout Cookie®
Posted by RAD at 07:56 AM | Comments (9)
February 06, 2005
RAY and THE AVIATOR
I have recently seen two of the Best Picture nominations for the 77th Annual
Academy Awards on Sunday February 27, 2005. I will write brief reviews for the
two very different biopics “Ray” and “The Aviator.”

SUPERBOWL XXXIX snacks
I write these reviews while at work watching Super Bowl XXXIX and feasting on
Rocky Mountain Oysters and hot wings, a staple in movie review writing and Super
Bowl watching. I have placed a bet that The Philadelphia Eagles will beat the
New England Patriots. As of this writing, the Pats are winning 14-7. I really
hope I win my bet…
“Ray”
Director Taylor Hackford tackled “Ray,” a movie about the life and career of
legendary music pianist Ray Charles. It has received six Academy Award
nominations. Jamie Foxx plays Ray, and let me tell you that I believe that Foxx
deserves the Oscar for best actor. I was watching the movie and thought I was
really watching Ray Charles as if the filmmakers traveled back in time to
capture him in his prime.
Foxx did a wonderful job capturing Charles’ mannerisms and voice. Foxx’s voice
was occasionally blended with Charles’ for the film’s songs, but from my
research and according to the film’s credits, it was Ray Charles’ voice in most
of the songs. Foxx does play the piano in real life.
This movie brought to light a lot of information about Charles as a person. I
was unaware of Charles’ 20-year addiction to heroin, his promiscuity and
aggressive approach to business. The movie even made me dig out an old Ray
Charles CD from my storage unit CD stack and I’ve been listening to it for days
on my MP3 player. Check out “Ray.” It’s a must see.
“The Aviator”
And then comes Martin Scorsese’s “The Aviator.”
Marty Scorsese is one of my favorite directors. There is not one film of his
that I do not like. I particularly enjoyed “Gangs of New York,” “Goodfellas,”
and of course “Casino.” “The Aviator” is about director and aviator Howard
Hughes' career from the late 1920's to the mid-1940's. Leonardo DiCaprio plays
Hughes. DiCaprio and Scorsese have become quite the excellent filmmaking team. A
lot of people may be down on Leo, but Scorsese is a brilliant director and can
bring out spectacular performances in anyone. DiCaprio gives an Oscar worthy
performance, but I believe he will be beaten by Foxx this time around. Hughes
was an odd fellow.
“The Aviator” is a beautifully shot period piece. Under Scorsese’s wonderful
direction, the editing and cinematography are first-rate, the production design,
costumes and makeup are lavish. The filmmakers have created a world of rich and
lavish color, of excitement and glamour. The soundtrack is fantastic, as I am
keen on this period in American history. Particularly the 1940’s. I think I was
alive in the 1940’s in another lifetime. Cate Blanchett does a superb job
playing the husky-voiced and charming Katharine Hepburn. Look for finicky cameos
by Brent “Lt. Commander Data” Spiner and hottie Gwen Stefani.
DiCaprio and Scorsese are collaborating again in “The Departed,” a remake of the
2002 Hong Kong hit with Matt Damon, Jack Nicholson and Mark Wahlberg.
It’ll be DiCaprio vs Foxx at the Academy Awards. We shall see who wins…
Posted by RAD at 07:01 PM | Comments (2)
February 04, 2005
Mars heat shield impact
Here is a neat picture of the heat shield impact site of NASA's Mars Exploration
Rover Opportunity. Click on the image for a larger version.

Image credit: NASA/JPL/Cornell
On the left, the main heat shield piece is inverted and reveals its metallic
insulation layer, glinting in the sunlight. The main piece stands about 1 meter
tall (about 3.3 feet) and about 13 meters (about 43 feet) from the rover.
The other large, flat piece of debris near the center of the image is about 14
meters (about 46 feet) away. The circular feature on the right side of the image
is the crater made by the heat shield's impact. It is about 2.8 meters (9.2
feet) in diameter but only about 5 to 10 centimeters (about 2 to 4 inches) deep.
The crater is about 6 meters (about 20 feet) from Opportunity in this view.
Smaller fragments and debris can be seen all around the impact site.
The Mars Rovers are alive after more than a year on the surface! Follow the
mission.

Posted by RAD at 09:16 AM | Comments (0)
Jockomo feena nay
I think I’ll name my first-born Jockomo feena nay. That’s a ritual chant used by
the Mardi Gras Indians very loosely translated it signifies "we mean business"
or "don't mess with us.” He’ll be one badass mofo. I’ll call him Jocko for
short. He’ll be better at sports than I was.
… see that woman all dressed in red - iko, iko ah nay.

Posted by RAD at 08:29 AM | Comments (4)
what a world
We live in a world where teenagers doing a summertime good deed by making
cookies and delivering them to nine scattered rural homes south of Durango,
Colorado, get fined $900 because some 49-year-old woman idiot became so
terrified by the knocks on her door around 10:30 p.m. that she called the
sheriff's department.
To top it all off, she then ended up in the hospital emergency room the next day
after suffering a severe anxiety attack. The girls who made the cookies did so
without malicious intent, they just delivered them at a late hour.
Has this anxiety attack lady ever heard of using the door peephole? How about
hollering through the door to see who’s there whilst brandishing a knife and/or
shotgun? It is rural Colorado after all. I thought all ruralies had some sort of
means to protect themselves in case a brown bear came a knockin’ at 10:30 p.m.
If this lady had communicated on even a minimal level at the start, all of this
hoopla would not have been necessary. She was probably hunkered in a closet
awaiting a painful death.
I get anxiety attacks when I get down to ½ roll of toilet paper left on the
spindle.
Posted by RAD at 07:37 AM | Comments (2)
February 03, 2005
chicken skins
Wouldn't it be breathtaking if you could go to the grocery store and buy sheets
of chicken skin to take home and deep fry?
Yes it would be. Then one could create, prepare, season and serve the well done
chicken skins to their liking in the comfort of their own home without ridicule
or shame. It would be glorious.
Chicken skin stands would bank on the beach. Viva fried chicken skin!
Posted by RAD at 08:46 AM | Comments (3)
February 02, 2005
U2 Tickets!
I purchased U2 Tickets for the U2///Vertigo///2005 Tour on April 20, 2005 at the
Pepsi Center. My sister, MELT and I are going. It’s going to be the grandest
concert ever in the history of rock n’ roll musik. Since I had to purchase
tickets for three people, I did not have the funds to get the best seats. I do
not care. As long as I can hear the music I’ll be happy.

A U2///Vertigo///2005 Tour ticket
Posted by RAD at 09:27 AM | Comments (2)
Hostage Doll
You know things in Iraq are improving when the Al Mujahedeen Brigade threatens
to behead a "Special Ops Cody” action figure meant to look like a U.S. soldier
who might be serving in Iraq. The photograph, posted on an Islamist Web site,
showed the doll sitting against a black flag with white lettering reading, "God
is great, there is no god but Allah." The US military reports no units have
reported anyone missing.

Special Ops Cody is being held hostage
Please Al Mujahedeen Brigade! I beg that you spare the life of this innocent
dollie! Action figures around the world quake at your mightiness.
“It’s a complete and utter embarrassment to the fellows of the Al Mujahedeen
Brigade I must say,” said Ed Grimley.
Al Mujahedeen Brigade, you show great prowess with your ability to score such a
precious action figure and then parade his innocent facade about the ‘net. I’m
laughing at you.
I triple dog dare you to behead “Special Ops Cody.” Go on. Do it. Spill innocent
plastic blood you barbaric bastards!
The new "Star Wars: Episode III -- Revenge of the Sith” Mr. Potato Head Darth
Tater action figure could not be reached for comment.

No comment from Darth Tater
Posted by RAD at 07:32 AM | Comments (0)
February 01, 2005
mental evaluation
Oh that wacky Boyd Owens. He loomed at the podium yelling obscenities in the
Oregon Senate chamber yesterday. He talked to himself and smoked a cigarette for
over an hour while holding a knife to his chest.
He gave up without a struggle however.

Wacky Boyd Owens
Madcap Boyd Owens was charged with criminal mischief, menacing and disorderly
conduct. Wild Boyd Owens was taken to a hospital for a mental evaluation. State
records show he’s been convicted of drunken driving, assault, drug possession
and theft in the past. A real winner this Boyd Owens must be. Strive to be like
him.
Off the wall Boyd Owens looks like Killer Bob in Twin Peaks minus the jean
jacket.

Owens and Killer Bob
Posted by RAD at 09:37 AM | Comments (4)